ahhaha. ohkayyyy i shant blog about how yesterday went cos snarly and phil have blogged bout it.

well i was reading phil's blog just now.
reading reading reading.

and some of the points he pointed out, i felt i was "guilty" of.
i shant go into details here cos its like a public blog.
but the gist of it being,

yeah i am someone who lets the presence of others affect my actions, especially towards a loved one if she's around.
i dont know if its male pride/dignity/blah, but yea when others are around, i feel "hindered" in actually expressing my thoughts/feelings to her.
so haha yeah that act cool shit is just real shitty lah.
just me putting up a strong front. :
but yeah lah its just slightly awkward cos she isnt exactly of "friend status" to me anymore, but my girlfriend?
well i cant exactly pinpoint what im feeling awkward over.
but what i do know is,
that im someone who doesnt really like showing my soft side to others, even though the "others" are my close friends.
yeah as phil said, there's this "image" thingy involved lah.

so yea i was like in quite a contradictory position yesterday.
on one hand, i wanna talk to her, find out whats wrong. (as in in front of other people)

on the other, something's telling me "eh no. dont. not yet. not while others are around."

these are kinda crude and unrefined emotions, so pardon me if u guys dont understand. lol.

sure, u can say screw that guy image shit and let the lub show.
but im pretty sure everyone has their own ways of expressing their love, be it directly or indirectly. :)

so for whatever i might lack in the PUBLIC love department,
i will make up for in the PRIVATE love department. ;)

fuck u all if u're thinking dirty.