Fysh tails. (pun pun)

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

This is a draft which i came up with on 20/4/2006.

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He is an emotional person.
He is feeling emotional.

Both sentences have the word, "emotional" within them.
Yet, their meanings are worlds apart from one another.

screw the first sentence. lets look at the 2nd.

when one feels emotional, what feelings do you experience?

loneliness? angst? depression?

well whatever feelings that surface, its all subjective.

u could,
be screaming and snapping at everyone u talk to.
be silent and cold to people around you.

bottom line is either one of these extremes.
either way, u're not happy.

Very often, when someone feels emotional, he or she could be

1. overloaded with thoughts that cannot be sorted out.
2. just feeling emotional for no reason at all. (think PMS)

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yaddah yaddah yaddah. writing that made me depressed. lawl.

SO, instead of trying to define "being emo",
l337 fysh shall save the world from attacks of the emo mongster.
by sharing some skeelz on combatting em0-ness. KEKE

1. Cry. doesnt matter if u're a girl or a guy. just fucking cry if u feel like it. of course u have to observe the surroundings. girls can cry on guys' shoulders. but if u're a guy and u're crying on a girl's, then i ought to soot in the head myself. which brings me to point 2.

2. Soot urself in the head. be it with a real gan or just a rubber band. it has been proven (BY ME) that sooting urself in the head with a projectile-releasing gadget causes certain psychological glitches in the head. gives u this "zomg im dead but im REBORNNNNN" feeling, which is refreshing to most emo people. yesterday i was emo, today i am not. because im reborn. maybe she's born with it, maybe its maybelline!

3. I know several people who kut themselves cos they're feeling emo. dont be stupid lah. kut what fuck. might feel shiok lah, but in the end got scar, then si teh ugleh lorhz. so dont kut. instead, use a fountain pen and draw/doodle on wherever u intended to kut. why a fountain pen? because a fountain pen has a sharp tip, and its very very fine. when u draw/doodle on ur arm/leg/face/body, its like kutting urself, minus the blood. for people who like to kut themselves, either u invest in surgical knives to help u kut better, or u invest in a fountain pen. and no a fountain pen does not cause blood to spurt.

4. People always like to suicide when they're emo. really lorh. just picture this. someone stands on the 99th storey of a building. he jumps down. then at the 80th floor, he is overcome by adrenaline and thinks to himself "ZOMG I DIDNT KNOW LIFE WAS SO ENJOYABLE AND MEANINGFUL. ALL THIS ENERGY! ZOMG" and then he dies, just when he realised that life consisted of so much more. so for fuck's sake, anytime u're feeling emo, try some bungee jumping or parashuting. or if u si teh poor, just invest in a kiddy trampoline. wouldnt have much effect, but then it sure would help u relive ur childhood, which would then lead to u thinking about happy stuff, which would then cure ur emo-ness. but if u dont have a happy childhood, then just fucking jump out of ur window right now.

5. When ur emo, listen to DISNEY songs. people often feel emo because they listen to too many love songs. and it certainly doesnt help if ur whole winamp list is full of love songs and u just broke up with whomever u were with. DISNEY songs are silly and stupid and absolutely meaningless. (and im not referring to songs like the one from Aladdin or Beauty and the Beast) I'm sure u've heard some silleh songs while watching disney cartoons before. k anyway, if u dont wanna listen to disney songs because they're stupid, there's always rock/metal music which will infuse u with all the angst and hate to replace that hollow space in ur heart that's causing the emo-ness. \|||/ ^.^ \|||/

6. When u're fucking emo, use fucking swear words like u've fucking never used them before. use fucking swear words in every fucking wo-fuck-rd, in every fucking line, in every fucking paragraph, in every fucking what-so-fucking-ever. say fuck whenever u take a fucking step, say fuck whenever u take a fucking breath, say fuck as u're brushing ur fucking teeth, say fuck whenever u fucking yawn, say fuck whenever u fucking blink. saying "fuck" fucking helps because it adds a fucking OOMPH in whatever fuck u're fucking doing. and what a better fucking way to start the fucking morning, then to fucking wake up and fucking stare at the fucking mirror and fucking say to ur fucking self, "Good fucking morning to u, _________. :-fuck-)"

7. However, if the above ways do not work, feel free to always consult a qualified consultant. (i.e ME, and NO ONE ELSE. unless i proclaim that he/she is qualified.)

FEELING IN THE DUMPS? FEELING THE BLOOS? FEELING LIKE LIFE HAS NO MEANING?
FYSH SHALL KEPLAKAN PUSENG UR LIFE AROUND! DONT HESITATE! CALL ME NOW!

9 Comments:

  • At 11:42 PM, Blogger Eunice said…

    lol fysh can i be your agent for your upcoming emotional management seminar? :D

     
  • At 11:45 PM, Blogger ChR0 said…

    SHURE. BUT U HAVE TO PAY ME FOR LETTING U BE MY AGENT.

     
  • At 12:10 AM, Blogger Stella said…

    1xNOTHOHSEI BLOG POST!!

    :p

     
  • At 12:11 AM, Blogger ChR0 said…

    DUN FRIEND U.

     
  • At 12:21 AM, Blogger evie said…

    hahahhahhaahhaaaha... KEPLAKAN PUSENG. haha

    AND DISNEY SONGS ARE NOT STOOPID!! NOT THE ONES FROM THE LITTLE MERMAID ANYWAY. =)

     
  • At 12:31 AM, Blogger ChR0 said…

    WHATS THE THEME SONG FOR LIL MILKMAID?

     
  • At 10:58 AM, Blogger Lysistarielle said…

    UNDER THE SEA...

    Er no I dunno.

     
  • At 4:39 PM, Blogger evie said…

    WHICH ONE ARE U REFERRING TO? GOT 'PART OF YOUR WORLD,' 'UNDER THE SEA,' 'KISS THE GIRL' AND 'LES POISSONS'

     
  • At 1:16 AM, Blogger alvyn said…

    lol wtf keblakan puseng.

    aiyah fysh's de-emoing methods teh suck. my method teh owns.

    just go run. pound pavement and everything is (Y).

    keluar... baris.

     

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